Monday, May 11, 2009

School's Out.

Friday was the big day. We law students donned our mortar board and velvety accented robes for a chance to shake hands with the Dean and listen to numerous speeches whose themes centered around what an awful time in history this is to be graduating. Luckily, Awesomeness was sitting next to me playing Pee Monkey and other fantastic games on his iPhone, so the time spent sitting in the quad was not altogether useless. The class president mumbled his way through his seemingly impromptu speech, making way for the clearly better of the two student speakers. Next up was the definite highlight of the ceremony- Professor of the Year. This guy knew how to make my second year tax law class enjoyable. His speech was perfect- it was brief, dryly humorous, and it mentioned John Adams. What more could a grad want? Absolutely nothing. I wanted to get up and leave after that, but I thought my parents might be disappointed if they didn't get to hear my name called and see me (or the tiny speck of me, as they were sitting quite far away) "get hooded." Then there was some more talking at us by a politician of sorts, and then finally we got our hoods. All I have to say is, good job getting the shade, friends. Friday could have been a lot worse. The best part of the day was probably introducing a professor I had 1L year to my parents and having her call me by my name. I am memorable! Sadly, I had to say goodbye to Shmind and British Friend, as neither wasted any time skipping town the minute the festivities were over. Ah well, such is life, as they say. Little do they know, our friendship is far from over. I fully intend to send mass emails updating them on my bar study progress. (Wait, that's a total lie. I detest mass emails.)

My red head girl was voted off American Idol. I heard this news days before I finally got around to watching the episode, and I still cried my way through her final performance. Even though I never expended the effort or money (Is voting free? If so, scratch the money part) to vote for you, Red Head Idol Girl, I am mourning your departure from the Idol stage, and I will totally buy (read: illegally download) your first album as soon as it is available.

A busy intersection near me recently put in a brand new diagonal crosswalk so people can shortcut to their destinations rather than waiting through two light cycles. I am not a big fan of this new development because we still end up waiting through two light cycles (since the little red hand stays illuminated even when traffic is moving with the would-be pedestrians) and we encounter angry old people whilst engaging in the diagonal cross. For instance, a few days ago I set out across the street diagonally and an obscenely old man walking towards me, also crossing diagonally, suddenly glared at me and barked, "IN the crosswalk, putz!" Completely startled, I turned around to see who he was looking at, and found the road behind me deserted. I really don't believe I have ever been called a "putz" before. Interesting. Additionally, while I can appreciate that this man chose to berate me using a word from the Old Country, I also have to wonder why he felt it necessary to call me out for being six inches outside the diagonal crosswalk. I thought the whole purpose of having a diagonal crosswalk and all the little walking men flashing from each screen at the same time was so that people could walk throughout the entire intersection without fear of being run over. I'll bet he was very upset when they decided to put in diagonal crosswalks. Just as he feared, first step: diagonal crosswalks, second step: bold pedestrians walking wherever they want. We're just a few more steps away from people walking across the street completely nude. Oh, progress.

As I depart from this town in a mere four days, I guess it is probably time to start packing. The thought of it is just so daunting, I really can't bring myself to begin. If only Otto came with those expandable zippers, it would make life so much easier.

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